ZooChosis review

Clapperheads has created a unique horror experience that falls painfully flat. It is buggy, repetitive, and needs to be condemned to the fiery pits of hell. Everything about this unusual concept is flawed! The gameplay suffers from great bouts of mundane nonsense, only to throw you in the deep end with mutated animals. Alongside this, the audio is rough as hell, and I swear I experienced time travel as the frame rates dropped to below 5 frames per second.

The result was a nauseating shit show that made me want to punch the wall and scream blue murder. To make matters worse, I had to endure this awful mess for hours to give it a fair review. Who says that reviewing games never has its downside?

As I said, Zoochosis is an interesting concept. You play the role of a zookeeper who must help sick creatures no matter their problem. You’ll have to scoop up their turds, monitor their vitals, and watch as they mutate into something altogether different. This idea really appealed to my macabre side. Furthermore, the ability to choose life and death for each creature was morbid, but oddly rewarding.

This concept would have been fascinating had the extremely poor performance issues not held things back. Moreover, the sheer volume of dull nothingness and the repetitive tasks were tedious to say the least. The developer needed to drip-feed the action in a more balanced manner. Had this happened, the mutated animals would have been more interesting, and the game would have flowed better.

Interesting ideas.

Moving between patients and grabbing different equipment was an interesting idea. However, when performance issues make the most basic of tasks practically impossible, you’ll want to hit the uninstall button ASAP. If I’m honest, I would have done that if I didn’t have to review this for the page. Sadly, that wasn’t the case, and I can’t undo what I’ve seen, nor can I get back the hours of my life I have wasted.

On top of this, the story is relatively short. With multiple endings to endure, you’d think I’d applaud the short playtime. However, if they somehow polish this turd, people will wonder why it has ended before things get going. In short, Zoochosis is a mess on multiple levels.

Zoochosis will make you want to vomit.

Mutated animals that look grotesque should have been the catalyst to make you vomit. However, motion sickness takes over as you hop, skip, and jump your way across the screen like Jonathan Edwards. On top of this, the cutscenes are too long, and the animations are rough as hell. If this isn’t enough, the audio is so scratchy and crackly that I liken it to an 80-year-old asthmatic who has chain-smoked 50 Cuban cigars a day since they were 10. Consequently, this looks terrible and somehow sounds much worse.

If you can overlook the terrible performance issues, you’ll enjoy a reasonably clean UI. This is destroyed by the poor control setup and ridiculous action commands. Furthermore, finding key items for each chapter was a chore, and I spent more time lining up the cursor than I did executing any health-related task. In theory, there is replay value. 20 different endings deliver 10 or more hours of gameplay. However, I can’t see anyone wishing to sacrifice their sanity or life to experience every ending.

Zoochosis is a mutated mess.

Every fibre of my being hates Zoochosis! It is probably the worst game I’ve played, and I’ve played some real stinkers. It is rough, tedious, repetitive, and quite frankly ridiculous. The fact that the developer wants 20 plus pounds for this atrocious mess is an insult to every gamer that has ever existed. I strongly suggest avoiding this absolute pile of trash. However, more information can be found in the Xbox store!