Commander Keen in Keen Dreams Definitive Edition Review

Commander Keen is a series of side-scrolling platformer games first developed by id Software, mostly known for their work on the DOOM and Wolfenstein FPS series. The series first saw the light of day way back in 1990 for MS-DOS. The first iterations were actually 6 episodes, a lost episode, and then a final episode. The series features Commander Keen, the secret identity of 8-year-old genius Billy Blaze, as he defends the Earth and the galaxy from alien threats with his homemade spaceship. The reception of the games was mostly positive which explains their longevity. And here we are in 2022 as we take a look at Commander Keen in Keen Dreams Definitive Edition.

Commander Keen in Keen Dreams Definitive Edition is the definitive edition of the aforementioned “lost” episode where our heroic genius, Billy Blaze, under his Commander Keen persona needs to fend off and survive a ghastly nightmare about… evil vegetables. Sigh. Collect your plant seeds and go on a rampage to escape this evil alternate reality.

Commander Keen in Keen Dreams Definitive Edition is a simple 2D platformer where players will run and jump through the game’s various levels. Unlike other entries in the Commander Keen series, our protagonist can pick up and throw seeds at enemies to turn them into a temporary plant instead of attacking with his trusty pogo stick.

Aside from your “deadly” seedy weapons, if you’re so inclined, you can collect chocolate bars, chocolate chip cookies, and candy to earn points. Most levels can be completed by avoiding everything and reaching the exit. Hell, I even finished a level under 4 seconds *by accident*. For others, you will need to find a key to unlock the door to the exit. You can also run and jump, but both movements are pretty useless and dangerous. Run constantly and you won’t avoid enemies in time (one-hit death game!) and well the jumping feels like you’re in space and isn’t as tight and precise as it should be.

I’ll try to describe the game’s faults as best as I can. While it’s playable, it’s completely useless to have released this game. You can complete levels within seconds, collecting items doesn’t yield anything and you can never really get rid of enemies because of the seeds you use for an attack. You need to collect the seeds because once you reach 0, you’re screwed. Also when you die, it’s back at the start. While it’s a big issue given how short the levels are, you don’t want to go navigate them more than once.

Given that this is supposedly a definitive edition of a game from the 1990s, this version includes full widescreen support, twelve all-new levels (doubling the length of 1990 original), and a full music score. If you’ve played this in the past, unless you’re really curious about the new levels, nothing here screams “definitive edition”. Hell Rockstar Games’ catastrophic Definitive Editions of the GTA Trilogy are better than this.

As a fan of the original Commander Keen games from the 1990s, I do appreciate using the same color palette, character design, and overall visuals. Obviously, old-school visuals aren’t for everyone, but it does look great as a whole. Although some levels are a bit too similar in terms of design and color palette. Enemies are barebone and generic. As for as the audio side of things, it’s an auditory hell that will make your ears bleed. While it’s understandable that at the time, that’s what was possible, however by today’s standards, it’s absolutely atrocious.

Unless like me you grew up with older Commander Keen adventure on old PCs such as an Intel 286 or you’re looking for something ultra simplistic, Commander Keen in Keen Dreams Definitive Edition is ok at best. The jumping feels like overkill and the pathetic attack of turning enemies into temporary plants is quite useless. The whole game feels useless. It’s just another argument to leave some franchises dead in the past especially if you don’t plan on updating/remaking them. The first six episodes deserve a definitive edition treatment. Not this. Only hardcore Commander Keen fans need to apply.